I'm a loser baby...

Having recently turned twenty-five, I am now officially an old maid. Spinsterhood has descended upon me, I have reached that expiry date stamped on the underside of my foot and girls in their teens will be warned against turning into me.

I've been trying to go out and have fun in order to distract myself from the feelings of worthlessness but it's not worked out too well. My mother starts calling me repeatedly after 6pm for updates on my location and to encourage me to "come home soon". Also, my socializing is interfering with Eid visiting and causes no end of embarrassment as my parents have to explain why I'm not home at 4pm on a Saturday.

Kill me now.

Even with being in the lab for most of the day I'm still going through two or three novels a week in an effort to escape from reality. I'm upset at the end of the day and read in bed by the dim light of my lamp until I'm too exhausted to keep awake. Then I spend the next day tired and jumpy. I'm still unemployed. Still plain and mouthy and graceless. Still a failure in other words.