It's a Ramadan Miracle!!!

I have no idea why my blog is lime green. I don't like lime green. I'd even go so far as to say that my feelings for lime green verge on dislike. I'm too wishy washy to commit to actual dislike. I considered changing my template but then I'd lose all my customizations! You might ask, what exactly are these customizations? Well, I have all of THREE links to the left. That's right, THREE. So fine, other than the one linking to Yaser's blog, they're random but back when I put them in I had this (totally unjustified) sense of accomplishment. Now if I change things, I'll have to redo the links which would suck.

Anyway, layout problems be damned, I have more important things to talk about. I'm going to Nuit Blanche!!! Don't ask me to explain how that happened when I normally have trouble getting permission to stay out till 9pm. I'm not going to analyze this too much; just go out and hopefully have a great time. All-night contemporary art thing here I come!

My new friends are all adults and my old friends all have scattered

I'm all sad and lonely. Yet another one of my friends left today; running off to far Australia. I went with her to the airport and we've promised to stay in touch. She probably will. I probably won't. I suck that way. I'm really going to make an effort and try this time though. It's that point in life where everyone's scattering, growing up, settling down or blowing wild like tumble weeds. As the title of the post, (which comes from a Sloan song, Autobiography) implies, the friends you make later in life may be wonderful but they aren't the same as people who knew you when you were young and in that stage in your life. The people I befriend now may turn out to be absolutely wonderful but we won't have the same crazy stories and stupid conversations. When I'm 65, they won't be the ones who make me feel like a ditzy teen-ager. It's just a different relationship. So, as more and more of my friends get further and further away, the feeling that it's the end of an era gets stronger. I'm determined that unlike with my high school friends, I'm going to keep things going this time.

All the love you bring, won't mean a thing....

I've got a bunch of depressing songs all queued up on Winamp to fuel my self-pity. Some of them make me cry. Some of them make me feel better. One even makes me mad. I call it my grey music. Most of the songs on my grey list are break-up songs since it seems that there's nothing like a broken heart to get the sad music flowing. Here are some of the songs on my list:

Set fire to the third bar- Snow patrol with Martha Wainwright
My favourite song right now. It's one of the songs that makes me feel better.

Strange and beautiful- Aqualung
It's so sweet. Fragile and delicate aren't the right adjectives for a song but those are the words that come to my mind.

Hallelujah- Rufus Wainwright
There are so many versions of this song but I like his best. There a certain rawness to his voice that's almost painful to hear. He's Martha Wainwright's brother btw.

Rabba- from the soundtrack to Musafir
I don't actually understand Hindi but even having no idea what it means this song is lovely. I did watch the film later and from the subtitles, it's about begging God not to let you fall in love. A good prayer really.

Work- Jars of clay
I was flipping through the channels late one night and this song caught my attention in the 3 seconds I normally spare per channel. It was being performed on the Christian station. It sounded even better "pseudo-live". There's one line that always gets me, "I'm not afraid of drowning, it's breathing that's taking all this work", because it's the truth.

Weight- Sarah Slean
I still kick myself for not going to her free performance in the Arbour Room. At the time I'd never heard of her and I did something stupid instead, like study up in the Map Room. This song just sort of rolls over you, or falls down like heavy rain. I think the male vocals are Hawksley Workman whom I also adore (and did see in concert).

Mad World- Gary Jules
A bit obvious as far as downers go. I mean it has to be with a line like, "The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had". Still, it's a good song and has a little extra kick if you've watched (and liked) Donnie Darko.

Blue Flashing Lights- Travis
This was a bonus track on one of their CDs. I'd listen to it again and again in high school. It felt like the story of my life. Well, there's no alcoholic in my life but the sentiments.... Everyone has to have the teen-aged angst song they felt summed up their life and this was mine. It's my sort of angry song.

Skin- Alexz Johnson
It's a fake song, kind of. Or rather it's by a fake person. According to my sister it's from some CanCon show called Instant Star. In which case it's pretty good for a fake person. If that makes any sense....Bah, I'm getting sleepy now. Guess I'll add one more song, make it an even ten. I know, I'm a slave to convention.

E ajnabi- from the soundtrack to Dil se
Another Bollywood soundtrack. The songs weren't subtitled on the DVD I watched so I don't really know what it's about. Ajnabi means stranger though. I think a song might even be more effective if you don't know what the lyrics mean. You can just hear the music and emotions.

So yeah, if you need a soundtrack to slit your wrists to, the above songs are a good start for your playlist.